Thursday, 10 June 2010

Eating cardboard


I am sick of eating cardboard.
You may wonder why I'm eating cardboard, I certainly am.
For a week now everything I eat is almost totally tasteless, so it may as well be cardboard.
I love the ritual of food.
I love cooking and preparing meals.
On the whole I love cooking for other people.
But right now even that is an enormous effort, as what's the point in making anything when it ends up tasting like cardboard.
For me there is nothing nicer than getting my breakfast ready. I eat fresh fruit, cold meats and a croissant most mornings, with one or two cups of coffee. Not now, I'm eating and drinking cardboard. So even though I'm still lovingly preparing my repast, this mornings was fresh pineapple, kiwi and nectarine, I can't taste it.
I'm eating things cause I know they are good for me. Providing me with the vitamins and minerals I need, but it's all just stuff I'm putting in my mouth and chewing.
Even the curry that youngest son made last night wasn't enjoyable.
I can't remember ever having lost my taste buds for so long.
So what with that and the adverse reaction to the first choice of antibiotics I'm feeling pretty fed up.
Yesterday it all just got too much and I couldn't stop crying. I haven't been this run down for a very long time.
I pride myself on looking after myself, lots of exercise, good food, pampering myself, resting all the things that counterbalance my hectic life.
But right now I can only cope with the bare essentials.
Even my eyes are too sore to read for very long, which is seriously bad, as my biggest form of pampering is escaping into books.
I feel like wailing and gnashing my teeth and complaining that woe is me, but I don't have the bloody energy!!!
Normal service will be resumed when the cardboard mountain has disappeared!
And it's cold, so I'm having to wear a cardigan at all times
And I'm sick of coughing and blowing my nose
And I'm sick of moaning!!!

21 comments:

Zan said...

hugs hugs hugs hugs hugs

only a little longer and the antibiotics will do their trick and perhaps then a few rays of sunshine will come back out again and warm you up.

xx

Merry ME said...

Byrd,
I'm so sorry to hear you are feeling so awful. Wish I could do something more then offer a cyber shoulder to cry on.

Here's hoping you'll regain your desire for food soon, and be back on your feet, feeling much better even sooner.

Zan said...

have you considered getting a few audio books? That way you can close your sore eyes and still escape to the world of books.
xx

BenefitScroungingScum said...

Hugs & hope you feel better v soon. BG Xx

Lyn said...

Ah Mandy - I feel so badly that you are not feeling well and like your usual self. Soon the meds will work and you will feel better, until then, I suggest just goping with it ... wallow and cry until there are no more tears. You will feel lighter. Sending you big hugs and loads of good wishes to cheer you.

nitebyrd said...

I hope you feel better soon, Byrd.
((HUGS)) to you. Crying can be very theraputic as long as it doesn't go on too long. You're probably sick and tired of being sick and tired! I'm sending you some good thoughts and positive energy.

TALON said...

I am so glad the title didn't refer to a new diet, Fire Byrd! (though it obviously feels like one for you).

We're having the same cool, wet weather. It seems horrid to put on long sleeved shirts and jeans again.

I hope you feel better once the course of antibiotics is done and you can breathe easier and taste your delicious foods again.

The times I couldn't read with ease or pleasure, I looked at art books or gardening books. The photos took me away and weren't such a strain on the eyes. I always think of them as adult versions of children's picture books. :)

Sage said...

Mandy, bronchitis is not nice nor kind to the soul nor body. I hope that you feel better soon and that your sunshine and tastebuds soon return tenfold in strength xx xx

Paula said...

Thinking of you, glad we could connect before Iam off to walk my a... off. Keep you in my mind.

AkasaWolfSong said...

(((Mandy))) I wish you were here so that I could make you a wonderful steaming bowl of healing soup to sip on...something to ease that bronchitis which is horrid to say the very least...I get it way too much so I know the cardboard scenario. Just know I am sending healing waves to you and a wish for a speedy recovery!
Let those tears fall too!

Bless You Dear Heart!

Angela said...

I am ofering you some of my good vegetable soup, too! Even if it tastes like nothing, it will still be good for you, especially with all the TLC! Be good to yourself and only wait a little while!! Next week you will have forgotten all of this. Maybe your visit to Auschwitz is also still haunting you?

Wipso said...

Oh poor you. I'm sending you lots of healing hugs.
A x

trousers said...

I thought you were going to say that you're on some insane regime with your food and that you were just eating crackerbread or something...

It's rubbish when you can't taste anything properly isn't it? Bad enough feeling unwell in the first place, and then you're denied the pleasure of nice-tasting food too, it's like insult to injury.

Sorry, I realise that was going into territory known as Not Helping.

Hope you start feeling better soon and that your taste buds return tout suite xx

Anonymous said...
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CheekyDani said...

Awww. Reading this I wanted to scoop you up and give you a big hug. Poor Byrdy. Hope it improves soon. x

diney said...

Poor you - hope you can taste food again soon! And feel much, much better x

Anonymous said...
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Anonymous said...

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Innocent said...

It is a chance of course to eat up all the stuff in the fridge that you don't really like.
x

Mel said...

Nummmmmmm...curry! :-)

*cough cough cough*

<-- likes curry bunches and lotsa

(Just practicing to see if himself might wanna fix curry....)

(((((( the byrdie ))))))))

You poor thing...seriously--it sucks to be that unwell.

miss*R said...

it sounds like your immune system is taking a battering so you can't fight off the chesty thing.. lots & lots of chicken soup with tons of garlic.. warm socks if it is cold and green tea... and lots of nurturing.. sending you hugs to help you through xoxo
[I may be scarce over the next few weeks in visiting - with renovating and moving.. so don't think that i have forgotten to visit.. xoxo]